A cosmic awakening

About five years ago at the age of 31-32, in mid-Feb 2017, I had an amazing legitimate worldview-changing experience following a deep dive soul-call with ishvara pranidhana and prapatti/saranagati of pranahuti with ekagra (flinging one's self at the feet of divine compassion in surrender, opening up to the influence of grace). Since then I learned many technical and experience-authenticating consciousness terms from Yoga, especially Kriya and Raja as presented by Paramahansa Yogananda. The following was after several months of asceticism (tapasya austerity especially giving up alcohol) and interest in the Triadic Dimensional Distinction Vortical Paradigm and Sri Yukteswar's The Holy Science (I hadn't read much of Yogananda at that point), and just naturally in keeping with cursory interest in Patangali's Eight Fold Path, though I hadn't studied it deeply, at least not in this lifetime. I was also living about a block away from a SRF meditation center, but I didn't find that out until later. I had also moved recently, following a dream.

I awoke in a state of mental and sensory interiorization (pratyahara and yogic wakeful sleep, one pointedness), aware hearing my squishy heart beat and blood circulation only, awake but body asleep with eyes closed (jagrat sushupti) watching the body breath in and out with tranquil ocean breath (ujjayi pranayama) while centered somewhere in the midbrain, possibly medulla or looking at ajna. I felt an indescribably subtle spiral-like sensation like crawling ants in the coccyx muladhara chakra. This feeling and energy (kundalini) rose in the spinal sushumna (brahma nadi) until I didn't feel it. My awareness descended to heart (hridaya/guha or Amrita Nadi) quite near the anahata chakra, when I became aware of being guided. The presence cradled with hands some sort of vital spark or flame (agni, hamsa, psychic fire, or puran purush) from my heart area (amrita nadi extension of sushumna) with great attention and spirited it away behind me, perhaps weighing or inspecting the flame (esoteric achievement fire?). The presence untied the (chit jada) knot (granthi) of Vishnu with close inspection, and I felt the knot untie and hang at my sides. Soon in both ears but mostly on the right I spontaneously experienced the joyful, faithful sound of the vibration of all creation (Aum/Omkar vibration) and felt a profound and curious oneness with the sublime sound and silence, eking and trailing to a very subtle fineness of resonance. Then, guided, my focus went to the breath which stopped spontaneously (kevali khumbaka) and my focus came back to the point between the eyebrows, where the upswelling kundalini energy gathered and mentally pushed toward the spiritual third eye (kutastha) but was rebuffed. I reproduced the action, merging with the supreme brahman through a sproinging astral tunnel, the stargate. I left the physical body spiritually (kaivalya? mahasamadhi? phowa/utkranti? videhamukti/paramukta) and traveled through an opposing wall into my living room, ending up immediately wide awake with unblinking eyes wide open with lucid awareness. I felt whole and centered and balanced, with slight positivity but mostly calm centered clarity, as if I was introduced to myself and pure super-consciousness samadhi (turiya) as a tensegrity of strength, sweetness, simplicity and truth (satchitananda nondualism), with an insight into my true self (atman, svarupa, sahaja), with perfect understanding. My last thought (manolaya) during this travel into the sacred silence was a question, "How old?" and I took up a position in my meditation chair like a maryosha doll monad inside the guide. I was picked up and moved into a different chair in the room, but did not feel anything. I beheld a radiant being (siddha, astral satguru, guardian angel) of pure clear self-luminous conscious light (sambkogakaya or astral body?, deva) with darkened eyes only, and very subtly perceived backbone discs of clear light (causal body?), radiating divine twinkling love and wisdom (santosha?), and a decidedly male, possibly Germanic and definitely Christ-like impression which I intuited (pratibha) immediately. I concentrated (samyama) the silent age query on him and intuitively sensed the answer was beyond my ken (greater than thousands of years maybe always forever, measureless presence) and I could sense his history and positive regard/interest directly. I did not have a similar impression gauging/intuiting a mundane wall in my apartment. An invisible structured download of informational distinctions or helical energy came propagating/whirling/trickling like invisible jewels in my left visual field from him (high frequency yogic dharma transmission? pranahuti, soul technology of superfine thought, essence of concept) and I absorbed it (hyper-dimensional compartments? attunement). He then took me by the shoulders and summoned some kind of cosmic magnetism, towering over me inspirationally (mahashaktipat diksha initiation? transfer of merit?) in what I interpreted later as an exhortation of either unbounded christ-/cosmic-consciousness or growth or flying to the astral world or another kind of transmission/initiation. He did a flipturn off the wall of my apartment in the direction of my physical body (parakaya pravesha vijnana?) and at that very thought of body my eyes closed involuntarily and naturally. Reflecting on it now, I note that an astral cord was not present when I looked in the direction of my physical body. I woke up whole and healthy the next day, and the divine feeling of the moment’s drop of Brahmic bliss has lightened my heart forever since. May it do the same for you.